Drinking Survey Time!

1. Have you ever been drunk? I am right now!2. How old were you the first time you got drunk? The womb. (just joking, Mom!) 3. Have you ever gotten/given digits while intoxicated? How else do you get cheap and easy sex?4. Have you ever 'drunk dialed'? I am guilty as charged. 5. Have you ever been drunk in front of family members? Have you met my family? It's genetic. 6. Have you ever had to cover up the fact that you were drunk? Once in a while. 7. Have you ever been arrested for any alcohol-related crime? No. 8. Have you ever hooked-up with someone while drunk? Yes. 9. Ever forgot their name? No. Lies, I have. 10. When was the last time you were drunk? Does now count?11. Have you ever been on a drunken binge? I work in a bar, what do you think? I have been on a binge since the early eighties!12. Do you need alcohol to have a good time? No. I need it to keep the voices silent! 13. What kind of alcohol gets you the most intoxicated? Red wines. 14. Favorite liquor? Ketel One Vodka!15. Favorite beer? Guiness!16. Have you ever woken up after a night of drinking and found out that you are STILL drunk? It's better than a hangover!17. Have you ever swam drunk? Skinny dipped at my Aunt's house with my cousins after a few beers. Yes, I was very young, Mom. It's all Dawn's fault!18. What kind of a drunk are you? Happy! Very happy!
19. Is alcohol like "truth serum" to you? Truth comes out of a bottle. And sometimes, it's real ugly! 20. Favorite drinking partner? Ketel One. 21. Favorite bar? One that serves alcohol and doesn't charge me. That would be my club!22. Have you ever completely blacked out? I have lost moments of the evening. 23. Have you ever puked from drinking? Only to make more room for more alcohol!24. Have you ever had the 'crying drunks'? No. Thank the gods!25. Can you still do physical activity while intoxicated? Yes. Making another drink is easy and sex is always an option.26. Have you ever gotten into a drunken fight? No, I won't spill my martini!27. Who is the most annoying drunk that you know? Miss Patti!28. Who is the most flirtatious drunk? Not me. 29. Do you have a drunken nickname? No.30. Have you received a 'booty call'? Yes.
31. Funniest drunken scene in a movie? Why watch people drink when you can do it for yourself!32. Favorite song about drinking? They write songs about alcohol? Really?!
33. Have you ever woke up next to someone you didn't know? No. I hear it's fun!
34. Have you ever been hit on by someone way older than you? Always. 35. What's the worst 'buzz kill'? Nothing, actually. I usually don't care what's going on and won't let it interrupt my "personal fun". 36. Have you ever dated a bartender or bouncer? No.
37. Do you ever say to yourself, "Dang, I need a drink"? I would NEVER say "dang". I don't need a drink, either, I already have one in front of me. 38. Do strangers ever buy you drinks? They'd better or I get their ass thrown out of my bar!39. Have you ever drank too much on a date? Date? I haven't been on a date in a long time. 40. Is there anything that you refuse to drink? Not really. Maybe white wine, I got a serious hangover on Chablis once and I still haven't gotten over it. 41. Have you ever been drunk on a plane? I have boarded a plane drunk and on mood altering substances but, I don't get drunk on planes. 42. Have you ever gotten drunk during the day? I am drunk right now. 43. Have you ever had to run from the cops and leave the beer behind? Dahling, when the cops come, the party gets an automatic "10" rating!44. What's your favorite drinking game? I do not play games with something as serious as alcohol. 45. Have you ever injured yourself while drunk? See the next question.46. What's the most destructive thing that has happened while you were drunk? I slipped on a patch of ice, fell on my back and broke my mohawk. I was devastated!47. Ever been drunk at a concert? Yes, that's why you go. 48. Is this survey getting too long? It was after the first question.49. Are you ready for the last question? What high school bitch wrote this survey?50. Why do you drink? To catch up with everyone else!