Boring, But That's February For You

Writing a little later than I wanted but I already forgot that I was supposed to devote a bit of my early morning routine to this little endeavor so... you get this now. 

Woke up after a rather good night's sleep. Recently I've been having some sleep issues, waking up after a few hours ready to start my day and then taking forever to get back to sleep. Or I'm overheated during the night and wake up in the middle of nightmares. Having a full night of slumber uninterrupted was a small blessing. 
My usual morning routine has become a little 'Groundhog's Day' in it's repetition, which is a little boring but it does strangely appeal to my German side. Having a routine is comforting in it's way. I suppose it's also an off-shoot on my OCD, doing things in a particular order over and over again means all is right with the world. And Oliver seems to like it, we have our little dance worked out, feeding him, then he sits in the window for about an hour, then it's petting time, then it's play time, then it's back to the window. Maybe I was a cat in a past life. 

I got to the gym early and it was already full of people I didn't recognize but they were obviously from the A.E.W. pro wrestling show that was being filmed later tonight in Atlantic City. Lots of tattoos, dyed hair, very well build bodies, it was a little intimidating trying to work out around them, I have to admit. And, truth be told, some of them were really nice to look at! I did manage to get a really good workout in, maybe having so many fit people around me made me push myself a little more. 

I was going to walk home on the Boardwalk but the winds had picked up from earlier and the breeze was coming right off the ocean making it seem much colder than it actually was so, I ducked back into the Tropicana to get back to Pacific Avenue and the Jitney stop, passing even more pro-wrestlers wandering all over the casino and hotel area. 

I have plans to attend the BeVisible function at Wingcraft tonight with Charity. BeVisible seems to have taken the torch from the former Greater Atlantic City GLBT Alliance, hosting monthly mixers and events. I haven't been to Wingcraft in a long time so I'm interested to return and see if it got any better. One of our many Food & Beverage directors at the Claridge had left the hotel to manage over there. I'm hoping to see him if he's still the manager. 

My mother and step-father played cards with some friends two days ago and were told yesterday that the other couple tested positive for Covid-19. I'm hoping they didn't contract the virus, and if they did, the booster shots will do their job and mitigate the symptoms. Most people who've had the booster report milder symptoms, more like a nuisance cold. On the other side of the family, my step-mother had hip replacement surgery last Friday and was in hospital for a few days with minor complications. She got home yesterday so I'm going to pop over to see her and make sure she's okay. 

Hoping to work back at Lucy the Elephant sooner rather than later, the gift shop should be opening longer hours soon and maybe I can get a few shifts. I love working there even if the pay is not really all that much. 

Promises Kept, Day One

 I said I was going to try to write a little each day, and here's my first entry. 

The cheeky part of me wanted to leave that last sentence there and go on about my day but my better nature won out. To continue...

It's an early February morning, the outside air warming up above the usual chilly averages. That's welcome news, my 1950's summer home isn't very well insulated and once it goes below 30 degrees outside, my baseboard heating can't keep up. It's not unusual for my roommate and I to be bundled up in hoodies and sweaters during the day indoors. I don't have much planned for today, poverty keeps your idle and humble. Aside from the gym, I might attempt to run a few errands in the city (bank, drug store, Lucy) and then see to getting these closets sorted out. Helene's clothing filling up all the usable space in the living room and hall closets are weighing on me like the overburdened racks her clothing is hanging on at the moment. A lot of my frustration is Joe's fickle moods, he'll talk a lot about what he wants to do but getting him motivated in that direction is the hard part. And right now, I need him to sort through all of Helene's bins of clothes that are stacked in his room so I can use them to thin out the closets. 
I seriously just want to bag it all up in a bin liner and leave it out for the garbage truck. Although I'd probably have to pay them to haul away everything, there's just so much of it! 

My gym progress has been hit-or-miss. I can't do a lot of exercises that I used to be able to do, even with those long-term pains from injuries long ago. Those nagging and painful reminders have become much more pronounced as I get older and there are some things I can't do anymore. It's frustrating, obviously, but I make do with what I can do and ignore all the things I find fault with. But I have to say, I'm surprised I look as good as I do, I didn't think I could bang myself into this sort of shape ever again. Hopefully, by summer, I'll be closer to where I see myself. 

Financially, things have been a little stressful. Losing my Lucy the Elephant tour guide job until probably June has put a burden on my checkbook. I have my usual savings that I count on during the leaner winter months but paying for the dryer repairs was not budgeted and I'm feeling a little panicky about how far I can stretch things. And I have to buy a 5G capable mobile before next month, another large expense I didn't plan for. I've been scouting around for another part-time job but I haven't found anything yet. Well, anything of my station, lol. I may be back to scrubbing toilets if things don't change soon. I did have a spectacular weekend at the Distillery, hopefully that trend will continue. 

Planning on attending the BeVisible LGBTQ soiree tomorrow night at Wingcraft, a local chain restaurant at The Walk in Atlantic City. It's one of those all-the-same-faces events but I feel like I've become too much of a hermit, socially, so I'm trying to get out more and cultivate new friends. And I did go on a 'date' a few weeks ago, although I'm not sure about that, I may be barking up the wrong tree. It's strange how I spent most of my life on stage performing and behind the bar performing, craving that attention from everyone and now all I want to do is grab my cat and watch the telly. It's crazy how one's priorities can change so radically. The very fact that I'm usually in bed by nine o'clock every night still shocks me. 

Let's see where the day takes me, I think this is a fair amount of writing for my first (official) day back to writing again. 

Home. Gym. Home.

Being in a foul mood and on Facebook is not a good combination for someone like me. I have a tendency to speak my mind, generally, but I usually temper my bluntness with humour. It's the little bit o'sugar to help the medicine go down, as the song says. Miss Patti has told me over the years that I can be blunt to the point of mean. This being said, I realized this morning, as I was reading my friends Facebook status updates, that everything was rubbing me the wrong way. It wasn't anyone's fault but my own. Perception is everything and I was perceiving things through murky waters and I decided to log off, get my ass in gear and go to the gym. Right before I shut down the computer (and after writing a quick journal entry), I was going to re-load my mp.3 player with new music, I am so bloody bored with the hundred or so songs I have on there since I've been listening to them for the last month and a half during my four mile round trip journey to and from the gym. I realized, though, that my dino-puter hates me and it would be another hour or so for me to get it to recognize my little player and upload my music to it. Believe me, if I went to do it now it would load up right away. Because I was in a hurry earlier, it would take it's sweet ol' time and make me suffer. It was easier to shut the damn computer off take my walk without musical accompaniment. Although I wasn't relishing having to be with my evil thoughts. Time became a factor, though. I noticed during the news updates that rains were on the way and I didn't want to be caught in them during my walk so, after getting dressed in my gym clothes, I immediately left.

Off I went out the door. I felt the ocean-cooled air as soon as I left the porch and could see the clouds coming in from the south-west, the general direction I was headed. I wandered down Atlantic Avenue for a bit, passing the shops and stores that surround Little Rock Avenue and said "hullo" to the guys that I know at the salon in the neighborhood with a little wave and a smile. I cut down one of the streets to Ventnor Avenue since there are more businesses and people there. I wasn't in the best of moods but I wasn't that anti-social. I love to people-watch and Ventnor Avenue would have more people. I didn't take long for my attention and my thoughts to wander and I was looking at the trees and blossoms all along the way, taking in the intoxicating scents the flowers were producing. Springtime is a wonderful time of year on my island of love, heralding the coming summer and the show that nature puts on is a beautiful sight to see, smell and feel. I found myself reaching up and touching the petals of the flowering trees and standing there as they cascaded down around me when a gust of wind knocked them loose. For although I was in a dark mood, I still managed to enjoy the world around me.

At one point, though, a kid on a bicycle came barreling around the corner of one of the stores and nearly crashed into me. I muttered a few foul things and continued on my way down the avenue.

I got to Body Architects and it was blessedly free of people, a luxury I rarely had at Island Gym when I went there. So far, going in the early afternoon seems to be the golden time, few to no people which gives me the entire place to myself. I greeted the owner and said hi to the person he was training and began my workout. I have raised my weights again, getting closer and closer to the levels I was at nearly a year ago and that felt good but my mind-set was still dreary, as the oncoming weather, and it took me a while to get myself motivated. By the time I finished my chest exercises, I was feeling better. Kat, Helene's trainer, came in and we talked a bit and I had to speed up my workout a bit. She said that it had started to spritz when she came in. That meant the rains were coming a little earlier than anticipated.
Looking at myself in the mirrors there gave me a little ego boost. I can really see the results of the past month and a half of working out and dieting. I'm beginning to lose the fat weight and gain muscle mass again. I am getting that V-shape once more and I like how my arms are looking. My chest is always slower to build but it'll come along soon enough.
I finished up with my abdominal routine and grabbed my stuff, said my good-byes to the staff and off I went back home. It was ever-so-slightly spritzing and I figured I wouldn't get caught in the rain if I walked at my usual pace. My thoughts ran to-and-fro, thinking of everything and nothing of consequence. I seriously lack focus (except for the gym) and my mental state couldn't follow any serious train of thought if I tried. I think that's why I feel the need to write in my journal again. It really helps me maintain a more coherent thought pattern.

Although I'm not sure if this entry is a testament to that.

I had gotten a voicemail from Alvin whilst I was working out, inviting me to dinner once again. I lied yesterday to get out of a dinner engagement with him so he wanted to reschedule for today. I simply turned off the phone this time. It's not that I don't want to go with Alvin to dinner, I just don't want to go off my diet. Going to dinner at a casino buffet is way too much temptation. And if I just eat salad, it would be an insult. I figure that being unreachable is the best way out of this.
I got home, dreading an encounter with one of Helene's projects but, luck be mine, no one was here. I put my gym gear away and made lunch and a protein shake. Right now, I only eat Greek yogurt for breakfast, a shake and something healthy for lunch and then a salad for dinner. It's helped me shed the pounds but I am damned hungry!
As for the "Helene's project" quote above (of which I am one), she has a habit of taking in strays and Claudia, the latest one, can usually be found sprawled on the couch, eating all the food, endlessly chain smoking and talking non-stop. She's harmless (as far as I know) but annoying as all hell. She lives in her car and Helene told her she can use the shower if she needs it. She took that as an open invitation to move in during the day. Today, though, she's a no-show and it makes me a very happy Mortimer. I figure she got her unemployment compensation and is now pissing it away at the casino.

I guess I'll venture back into Facebook and see what's going on there. Then maybe I'll finish one of the many journal drafts I have waiting for me (since I seem to be on a roll, writing wise).